Like A Rat In A Trap..

While we’re all getting naked here, or at least I seem to have been, I feel there is something I need to mention. Telling you this is not something I ever intended to do.. but I think I should be honest with you now..

I don’t sleep like normal people.

There. I said it. Now we can all move on, right? Err, probably not. What does that statement – I don’t sleep like normal people – mean? How did it happen? Is something the matter with me? I’ve asked myself that many times but never found an answer other than it is possible that I am actually a vampire, without all the teeth and blood sucking stuff. I prefer the night time. I function better at night time. To try and stay on a schedule which involves getting up at 7:30am and going off to work has always been a nightmare for me.

I have been struggling with this situation like a rat in a trap, for years now. I ask myself when am I going to stop struggling, and just accept? It’s not like I am working right now. I have no reason to keep banging my head on this particular wall, other than the disapproval from my Mother. Which there is a LOT of.

Being on the night time schedule actually works out ok for The Other Half and I. I’m awake (or waking up) when he gets home from work. I’m awake when he gets up in the morning. I go to sleep when he leaves. I sleep while he’s at work. It also works out ok as far as the Internet is concerned.

I sometimes seem to function best on a up for 16-18 hours then sleep for 7-12 hours. Right now I’m apparently stuck on a 12 hours awake then my batteries run out and I sleep for 12 hours, and the 12 hours I am awake seem to be the daylight hours. It is almost as if the daylight sucks more power from my batteries like some rabid power tool.

Wednesday and Thursday morning this week, at 5am my brain woke up. When my brain wakes up, it is like a marching band just turned up in the bedroom. Going back to sleep is impossible. I could lie there and toss and turn but I’d only wake The Other Half up. So I get up, quietly put together some warm clothes, sneak out of the bedroom as quietly as I can, turn on the coffee machine, turn on the computer.

When I am on the night-time schedule, this could happen anytime between 4-6pm. I might not wake up till the other half actually gets home from work. On Saturday nights we go to dinner and I may have only been awake for an hour. I never tell my Mother because if I did she would go all berserk and stuff. I just pretend like I’ve been awake all day, and this meal I am eating is not breakfast for me.

This week I am worried I might not even make it to dinner time. I have to try and stay up longer today just so I can go to dinner tomorrow and then my batteries can run out after I get back.

This is yet another reason I do not want to bring people under the age of 18 into my life. Well, it’s not exactly normal, this vampire-esque lifestyle I prefer.

I’m looking forward to the day I can simply say – that’s the way it is – and stop fighting it. I hope that day comes soon, but only I can say that to myself. The Other Half and I have already talked about it and we’re agreed that I should stop fighting it.

In other news, I heard that my Dad’s new car has arrived and he should be picking it up today. I wish I could share pictures of it with you my blog friends but the paint job is pretty distinctive, a bit too recognizable.

I might have a bit of an arty day today, considering I am now back to only one West Wing episode a day.

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