The Resolved Unravels

I rarely drink but when I do, I like to have a salted caramel martini in front of a roaring fire. ;)

It has been a big couple of weeks here in Snoskredland – with The Other Half leaving his toxic job and moving to a new job on top of a birthday for me and some news about former colleagues at the toxic job, a place where I also worked too..

Remember when I told you I didn’t work there anymore – at the very end of that post I said –

For me there are some unresolved issues that simply will never be resolved. Years ago that would have driven me crazy. I hate unresolved stuff. Now I am pretty good at resolving my side of it and letting it go.

I am pretty good at that UNTIL I discover that the very thing I most feared happening has actually happened. In order to explain that statement to you, I have to give you a little bit of not especially interesting history but I don’t want to go too far into detail.

Last year, mid-Santa, my offsider told me she had been sexually harassed by the 2nd in charge person. Given that she was very young and newly pregnant, she did not want to “rock the boat” by reporting what happened. I felt very strongly that she needed to report it.

Guess why? Because if she didn’t, and it happened to someone else, there would be no record of it happening. But she was resolute – I suspect because the 2nd in charge had something he was holding over her head.

While I could not report it because it did not happen to me, I was able to speak up and raise concerns and I did make it very clear to the business owner what had happened and who had done it. Of course without an official complaint he could not do very much, so he called both her and myself into his office and tried very hard to get her to make an official complaint or even just tell him personally so he could take action without making it official but she still refused.

If I had been the business owner, you can bet I would have made some changes even without an official complaint and the very first one would be dropping that harasser as second in charge. But as they say in the classics, not my monkeys, not my circus.

The harasser remained as second in charge, but I made it VERY clear to the business owner I was reporting directly to him as the owner from now on and while the harasser could be 2nd in charge of the rest of the store he was to have nothing to do with my area at all. I would not take no for an answer on that. He agreed with it. I would have quit on the spot otherwise and it was mid-Santa so he really had no choice but to agree.

I pulled the harasser aside and told him I knew what he had done and that I wanted nothing more to do with him at all, and that I had made my feelings clear to the owner. I refused to speak to him unless it was work related. I actually found it very hard to even look at him. I was furious because he had taken advantage of a young girl who he knew was vulnerable.

But I also had work to do, it was our busiest time of year and I had to focus in on that. As much as I wanted to punch that guy in the face on a daily basis, it would not have done any good. Ohhh, he was so slimy and smarmy and arrogant, knowing he’d got away with what he’d done. Some days it was very hard not to punch him but some how I always managed it.

As time went on, I kept encouraging my offsider to put in an official complaint or even just to put what happened in writing, and then give it to the HR manager and ask them to put it in the safe unopened for a later date in case it was needed. I felt that when it was time for her to go on maternity leave, she might want to take action then. She still refused. My main point was – what if this happens to someone else, how will you feel then?

I felt so strongly about this that I made a call to head office when I left, speaking to someone in a position of power that I met at the conference. I said look, I know there is nothing you can do without an official complaint but I wanted you to at least know this happened in case something else happens down the track. I did find out she actually took some action, arranging for the business owner to attend mandatory training re this particular area.

I suppose my former offsider would be able to tell me the answer to that question I asked now, because of course it did happen to someone else. I found out during the last couple of weeks. I don’t have specific details of what happened, but I do know the harassed person resigned and made an official complaint. The 2nd in charge received a written warning. I don’t know if he will remain as 2nd in charge.

But I am, again, furious. Despite my earlier attempt at resolving things within myself. If my offsider had made an official complaint, that would be two complaints of the same thing and it would be very unlikely he would still have the job let alone have a chance of still being in charge of anything.

I wanted to write about this many times and in fact I did write it out a couple of times and delete it, way back in December when it happened. This was a difficult situation to be placed in, and I hated it. And I was not the person being harassed. It was far worse for her. I’ve been bullied in previous workplaces but this was a whole other level of Not Awesome. It certainly contributed greatly to my decision to move on.

Nobody should have to put up with bullying or any kind of harassment in their workplace. We have laws in place to prevent this and many companies have strict procedures around all of this, but if the people involved will not speak up, the laws can’t do a damn thing.

If the people this happens to will not speak up, that leaves the door wide open for it to happen to the next person. And that WILL happen. If someone behaves this way and gets away with it, they think they can always behave this way and get away with it.

work

Sausage Roll Monday

It was a public holiday Monday which living in a Tourist Town means you could go somewhere as long as you pick the right direction but getting back would be Not Fun. So we spent our day cleaning, doing the washing and cooking.

My sausage roll recipe is super simple as long as you have a food processor. Throw in the quantities you like of the following vegetables –

Green capsicum (peppers)
Brussel Sprouts
Carrots
Leek

Whizz that up nice, then add 500g beef mince and one egg. Whizz that up some more, then lay the mince out on half a sheet of puff pastry, put egg wash on the opposite edge, and roll.

Once you have made enough to fill an oven tray, egg wash the tops of the sausage roll and sprinkle on a parmesan and herb mix. I tend to use my chip sprinkle which is paprika, garlic powder, parsley, mustard powder, black pepper, cinnamon, a touch of low sodium chicken stock powder, rosemary and any other herbs I feel like throwing in when I am making it.

We made 3x 500g beef mince packs. We ate a few for lunch, then all the other sausage rolls go in the freezer for a quick dinner at a later time. There’s 92 packaged up and frozen from this particular sausage roll venture plus a few to be heated up later for tonights dinner.

That’s what we’re cooking – what else is happening?

Watching – Chernobyl. We’re about to watch episode 3. Yes it is not an easy watch but it is an important watch.

Listening – to the Chernobyl podcast which goes along with the show.

Working – on a checklist for opening and closing the shop I work in – on Saturdays I now open and close and I have my own key. I am deeply enjoying my work and it is wonderful to be appreciated for the work I do, which is a novel concept after my last workplace where my boss really did not care or notice what I did.

Wondering – about the coincidences of life – my other half applied for one job which would work in better with going to Uni full time, he got the job and it turns out it is in the same building as the shop I work in. How bizarre is that?

Adding – a new treadmill to my space. A friend did not need theirs anymore so it came to live with us.

Eating – Thai Coconut Icecream which came as part of dinner we bought last week. The other food was just so-so but this icecream is amazing, I definitely want more of it.

Ordering – more protein as I am about to run out, it just arrived last week.

Wearing – my new brooches which arrived recently, they are gorgeous, especially the Bee. Click on this image for a larger view. :)

Home, recipes

Another World

Surely someone somewhere is cataloging all the worlds? I found this one near Daiso in Sydney. This is a world I could spend some serious time in when it is summer.

But it is decidedly NOT summer here at the moment. After a long streak of utterly gorgeous blue sky days with mostly warm weather – certainly warm for May! – the temperature has plummeted this week and we got over 100mm of rain in the space of 24 hours.

stuff

A Day Trip

Since February, twice a week The Other Half has been catching the train to University. While completely not envying the crack of dawn wakeup call he has been doing to achieve this, I have been envying the train trips. Especially as I have to get up quite a bit earlier on these days to enjoy my morning coffee which he makes for me before he leaves.

My schedule has not allowed me to join him for the most part but then came a week when I had the right day off, and I decided to make a day of it and head up to Sydney. I would have just over 5 hours there before I had to get on the train to return back home. Here are a selection of photos from my day out.

My very first stop was Starbucks but this was totally by accident. By the time I extricated myself from Town Hall station I was pointing in the wrong direction and ended up near World Square where I checked Google Maps to work out my way back to QVB. As I stood there I spotted Starbucks across the road.

I had the Cinnamon Dolce latte. I am a sucker for anything cinnamon and this was *very* cinnamon. Delightful! My nails are gold ombre glitter which lights up rainbow coloured in the right lighting.

Sufficiently caffeinated, I headed back towards QVB where I planned a general look around and wander. The first shop I spotted was Haighs and being a former Adelaide girl, I had to stop in for some dark chocolate frogs. I really wanted one of these dark Murray Cod with the beautiful foil wrapping too, but they were very large and a bit up money! The staff member gave me a couple of dark round discs for chocolate tasting as I left and they were most delicious.

My main goals for the day were simple – there were two. Go to Daiso, try on lipstick at Sephora. I was sidetracked by Bath and Body Works, where I bought some stuff and asked them to keep it aside for me so I could grab it on my way back to catch the train. I got a couple of handwash pumps and some antibacterial hand sanitisers..

I’ve been wearing lipstick to my new job and enjoying it. I last bought lipstick around 17 years ago – Revlon Colourstay in Faithful Fawn – and would you believe it still works just fine. I only used it a couple of times a year for the next 10 years or so and always marvelled when it still worked but I had not touched it at all in 7 years, not even for job interviews or special occasions.

Perhaps as a result of lack of regular use the seal on the clear lipgloss section appears to have become less awesome. I can still use it but I need to wash my hands afterwards as the barrel is a little sticky now.

I’d bought one Revlon lipstick “Endless Spice” on our recent Canberra trip – because Faithful Fawn appears to be no longer available. I was lucky because the shade does work for me. I was feeling ready to experiment a little and see what new things are available, in 17 years technology has come a long way and so it seems has makeup.

For the most part the lipstick I buy – Revlon Colourstay and it does stay until you remove it with a special remover! – you can’t really try on in shops even though they have testers out. I’m not a put it on the back of my hand person, before I can tell if a shade will work for me I need to put it where it will go, on the lips. And it is an expensive exercise to buy one then find out I hate it.

My understanding was Sephora is different when it comes to this kind of thing but I had no idea just how much so. When I managed to snag myself a staff member, they showed me where the disposable lip brushes, cotton buds, tissues and makeup remover were and told me I was free to try on as many lipsticks as I liked. I’d heard very good things about the Kat Von D range and all the lipsticks had names my other half would love, but I did not find a shade I felt suited me.

I ended up buying two shades from the Sephora collection. They are a bit more bold than I would usually wear so they are reserved for the days when I am feeling super confident. Unlike the Colourstay ones which have a base colour and then a lip gloss that goes over the top, these are a one application deal and they do stay on extremely well.

I was in there for over an hour trying on shades and then grabbing the other stuff I wanted – the makeup remover was brilliant so I got that, lip liner, a lip scrub, a lip mask, and some hand masks for the winter as the ones I bought last year I have used over and over again many times. I’m definitely putting some cotton buds into my handbag for chemist visits in the future as I do want at least one more colourstay shade.

Next up was a wander down to Daiso where I picked up a few things including a gorgeous carp tote bag.

I wonder what this diffuser would smell like?

A quick stop for lunch, a wander around Zara and H&M – Zara had a gorgeous bright orange coat which I should have bought but I said no. I picked up my bath and body works, grabbed a Starbucks to go, and ventured back to the train station feeling like this was a successful day out in general.

Sydney

Zero Gravity

How I loved this song once I knew the story behind it. They did a great Australian Story episode on it a couple of weeks ago and I was lucky enough to catch it. What an amazing idea and those dancers look like they were having a great time. I’d love to have a crack at that. They are actually suspended in the air on poles.

The Other Half is NOT at all a fan of this song. I think partly because it is very catchy and it does tend to get stuck in your head, and partly because it has operatic parts to it which he does not enjoy. He would prefer I do not listen to it in his presence which really means the only place I can play it is at work. I’ve just finished making a new work playlist with nearly 260 songs on it.

Another song which got stuck in my head this week was Brain Damage by Pink Floyd, which appeared in the Westworld season 3 trailer.

While looking for these two videos I stumbled upon this video of Julia Louis Dreyfus talking about fashion from her life.

A couple of weeks ago, unhappy with the local options for brooches, I went online and ordered a bunch of brooches direct from China. They have not arrived here yet, but can you guess what happened as soon as I did that? BROOCHES. BROOCHES EVERYWHERE. Most stores I went into yesterday had 5 or more options when previously they had just one. Obviously I prefer paying less than $3 for a brooch and if these turn out to be fabulous I may order more eventually.

The election went well and I truly enjoyed my day as second in charge. I was relentlessly cheerful. It didn’t matter what got thrown at me, I handled it with a smile on my face. I got to wear the yellow “supervisor” tabard instead of the purple “staff” one and I chose my outfit to match.

There were at least 10 of us in the booth all from different backgrounds and political leanings. There was one moment in the day where I got to make an announcement and everyone clapped and cheered – the news came in that former Prime Minister Tony Abbott had lost his seat.

For me I had always disliked that man because he insisted on imposing his religious beliefs on Australia. I do not think that is appropriate.

The moment that turned my dislike to utter hatred was when he sat at his sister’s wedding with a face like he was sucking a lemon. Tony was anti-same sex marriage and his sister was marrying a woman. He couldn’t even pretend like he was happy for her, not even when the cameras were watching him the whole time – it later aired on Australian Story, I think.

Yet when he lost his seat of 25 years last weekend, she was standing behind him, tears in her eyes, sad for his loss. She deserves a better brother.

There was one not so great leftover – I had to take someone to get dinner as they had not brought it and did not have a car. It wasn’t until we were in the car that I smelled.. them. A delicate bouquet of stale cigarette smoke, BO, long unwashed clothes, and perhaps foot odor. In total they were in my car less than 15 minutes, but when I returned to it at nearly 11pm, the smell hit me like a truck.

The smell did not leave over the following days, and I personally believe it attached itself to me at least once this week and followed me wherever I went. After that happened I took my car seat covers off and washed them even though it did not tell me I could wash them (hopefully I can put them back on) and then I took my car to be washed and hit with the fragrance bomb, and then I added a couple of scented things yesterday. I hope it will be gone today.

Anyway there you have it, a bits and bobs post. I’m hoping to get some time this weekend to write a couple of larger ones! ;)

music, work

A Little Bit Of Housekeeping

Exciting happenings in Snoskredland – I’m working this next election as second in charge as a surprise. It seems a lot of people have pulled out at the last minute, so I got the call and said yes.

Work is going well, getting shiznit done fast and enjoying every minute of it. How many jobs can you say that about?

Lots of walking and running happening here lately, too.

When I get some spare time I have a couple of longer posts to write. But this is just a quick one to say I am updating the blogroll to remove blogs that no longer exist or have suddenly begun posting weird stuff. Probably next week if I have time, I’ll make sure to add in my new reads.

Hope you are all well!

blog housekeeping

The Long Weekend

Our Easter long weekend was mostly a lot of lazing around. This year so far has been go go go for both of us, a lot of family outings, quite a bit of work for me, work and uni for the other half, just busy-ness in general.

Living in an area where a lot of tourists – referred to by some locals as another T word much less flattering – visit on long weekends, public holidays and school holidays, a staycation is your best way to avoid long queues, busy restaurants, sometimes badly cooked meals or meals you had to wait a very long time to arrive, and much traffic.

Once I left work on Thursday, we did not go near another shop and I will not until I go back to the shop tomorrow. Part of that is thanks to getting back into meal planning and a fortnightly shop.

We did go out for one long walk down to our former neighbourhood Callala Bay / Beach. We chose that instead of Huskisson as they were having a rather large event. They do have quite a good network of walking and cycling paths down that way now, so it is always a more peaceful option we can use if Husky/Vincentia is crazy busy.

We are never quite sure if a decision will be a good one until we are on our way there. In this case we feared the worst because the traffic was quite heavy on the way down but once we got there the people all went different ways and the walking paths were mostly free of insanity.

We did a 10km run/walk. I like to split my 10kms into two halves because the first 5km is where I usually run – in this case it was the first 2km and then some sprints – and the second 5km is a bit more leisurely. It was very hot out – almost 30C (86F) so we paced ourselves.

Part of this was through the neighbourhood known as Benton Sands which is a very lovely development. They have a community centre and pool and I believe the plantings were all supposed to be Australian native plants which does make for a more natural environment. It also does mean a bit more hayfever at this time of year, at least for us.

We passed this large group of swans feeding. I’ve never seen this many swans in one place at one moment before.

We ended up at the Boat Ramp on our way back to the car which is always great entertainment on a long weekend. It was absolutely packed with cars and boat trailers. BOATS AKIMBO. Absolute madness!

At home there was much coffee..

And cake.. which made me fit in another 5km run on Monday around our home block, in which I encountered a very large spider just hanging out on the ground for no apparent reason and let out an incredibly loud scream as a surprise to myself and though I did not ask I suspect also as a surprise to the spider. I went back and took a photo, which I suppose is a step in the right direction towards not being quite so terrified of those creatures. I will not share it here because That Is Not How I Roll.

At home there was The Bus at least once a day, AKA Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. I’m not much into the Marvel universe at the best of times and I couldn’t tell you anything about the movies but I love this show and their bus – aka the massive plane – is super cool.

I also binged Season 5 of Bosch which was deeply excellent, caught a few episodes of various shows which I am watching weekly at the moment in particular Line of Duty, LOVING Project Runway with Christian Siriano as the mentor, 24 Hours in Police Custody, COPS, and my one hate watch, Sister Wives. I like the wives, I just HATE the guy and therefore it is beyond my understanding how he has collected up 4 wives who can stand to spend as much as one minute near him.

Sephyroth and I caught up for a lovely video chat in which he updated me about a work conference he went to, sounds like it was awesome. I caught him up on all our happenings here.

I brought home the work laptop for the weekend so I could try and clear out some extra space on there, deleting useless games and various Windows junk which nobody wants or needs.

I also sat down with the Spreadsheet Maestro AKA The Other Half and we created a couple of things which will make my work life a lot easier. I’m fired up and super excited to get back to work today, then I have a couple of days off in which I will run quite a bit, and then a little more work.

How was your weekend – long or short? :)

coffee, exercise, food, Home, television shows

I Have Been Waiting For You

my new dark salted caramel friends. Yes, years I have waited. Why nobody made a dark salted caramel chocolate that I could buy on supermarket shelves, I am still baffled by. But here it is. And I am about to try it, right now, while writing this post on the blog. OMG yes it is awesome but a bit up money at $6 for this block. I will stock up when it goes on special.

Work has been fabulous. The new job is awesome and I am having a great time, with some minor adjustment issues all on my side.

You see, I had fashioned myself a uniform of sorts. It had to be very warm because my last workplace was like being set down on an Arctic ice shelf, with two air-conditioning vents directly above where I stood for much of my day blowing cold air on me. And hilariously in summer, the hotter it got outside, the colder it got inside. I wore Uniqlo heat tech long sleeve turtlenecks and a suedey puffer vest – with great pockets – and I was still freezing most of the time.

The new place is warm and if it wasn’t, I would be able to change the temperature myself. There is no uniform and probably no need for one though I could definitely come up with one if I wanted to. I did not realise how much time knowing what I would wear saved me each morning. I pick out my outfit the night before.

I also never wore earrings to my old job – it was actually too dangerous with the machinery. I always wore a brooch to make up for it. But now I can wear earrings, and I will.

Since the start of the year things have been quite chaotic in this household. With family from interstate visiting we had a lot more outings than usual and we’ve got out of the habit of many household routines, like the regular fortnightly grocery shop.

It has been more bitsy shopping here and there, picking up things for a few meals at a time because we weren’t sure where we would be. Batch cooking has also taken a back seat with The Other Half only at work three days a week and only needing three lunches.

It is time to get back on the no spend days horse, and time to get back on the grocery budget and meal planning. We’ve started that process today.

Home, work

I Don’t Work There Anymore.

You may recall last week my post Pondering small and large frustrations. I wrote that on the Sunday. On Thursday of that same week I resigned from my job because I had found a new one!

If you had asked me in January whether I would leave this job anytime soon, the answer would have been NO WAY. Absolutely not. I loved every minute I spent at work, I loved (with two annoying exceptions) the people I worked with, it was challenging, fun, interesting, never the same two days in a row.

There is a long version of this story but why would I bore you with that when I did not enjoy living it? Instead I will give you the super short version..

A day arrived when I was literally SHAKING with anger at work. That was the point I knew I had to move on.

I went to see my employment guru, we re-wrote my resume, I got my head in the job-seeking game, updated all my online profiles, set up email job alerts and joined the local job search groups on Facebook. I officially started job seeking on the 12th of March.

I found out about my new job in a store that I am a regular customer of via the Facebook – it seems these days a lot of jobs are not found on the job search websites.

Having been there a number of times and knowing their general vibe, I wrote a funny cover letter and attached my resume. I was the only one to take such a risk but it paid off, the receiver absolutely loved it and thanked me for making her laugh in the midst of many oh-so-serious cover letters, and scheduled an interview with me as soon as she had a spare minute. When I got there she told me she’d already decided to hire me just based on our emails back and forth – there had been several.

My interview was at 9 on Thursday 28th March, by 11 on Thursday I was at my now-former work resigning, and on Friday I did a shift at my new job. It was very fast and slightly a shock to most people when they found out. Heck, it was a bit of a shock to me but I am totally fine with being shocked this way. :)

I did not need to give any notice and I had made a pact with myself that if I did not receive a roster for the next week before I arrived to resign, I would not offer to work any more shifts other than to train someone new if they needed it.

I arrived to resign only to meet a new staff member who was being trained to work in my area as a surprise. Cheapskate Boss had not even bothered to tell me he had employed a new person to replace my offsider once she went on maternity leave.

We had talked about that happening eventually but I believed we had agreed to involve me in that process so we could find the right kind of person. That just confirmed to me – not that I needed any further confirmation – I was making the right choice in leaving.

I had thought it would be very difficult to walk away when the time arrived but in truth, it really wasn’t. When I went to pick up my stuff today – stuff I needed and bought with my own money in order to do my job because Cheapskate Boss would not buy it – I found out he has cut the shifts down to 4 hours instead of 5. I won’t miss many of the people but I will miss certain parts of my job.

My first shift at my new job went very well, it is a place I always loved to visit. It is definitely a different vibe to where I have been.

I’ve had a little bit of unexpected time off this week as I normally worked Monday-Tuesday-Wednesday. That has been good for me. I took some time to get organised wardrobe wise and house wise.

I also took some time to get out and exercise. We had some gorgeous weather as you see above! While exercising, I mentally packed my boxes of former job related shyte up and stored it somewhere that I won’t have to look at it.

For me there are some unresolved issues that simply will never be resolved. Years ago that would have driven me crazy. I hate unresolved stuff. Now I am pretty good at resolving my side of it and letting it go.

work

Toting

I’m known to be one of the worlds most organised people – if I think I am going to need something I bring it with me. I tote bag a lot. At one point in her 2018 New Zealand tour, the Duchess of Sussex Meghan Markle was provided with a gorgeous tote bag.

This sent me on a tote bag tour of my own. I eventually found some brilliant ones at Society 6. My experience has been that they are well made out of a good material and thus far I have been unable to destroy them with toting – as tends to happen to your cheaper and some of your more expensive options. They have three different sizes – the 13×13 is on the small side but perfect for lunching out and strolling, the 16×16 is a more useful size for shopping in general, and the 18×18 is good if you have to take a lot of spare stuff with you eg shoes and an entire other outfit like I did last weekend for the election.

There are many different kinds of designs. I was very tempted to get one for my Mother at Christmas that said “It’s beginning to look a lot like fuck this” because that is exactly how she feels about Christmas. Here are some of my personal favourites.

Succulent Garden

Gold Indigo Malachite Marble

“Honeybees”

Koi fish – Yin Yang

REALLY MERMAID BLACK GOLD

Effervescent Orange Atomic Age Black Kitschy Cat Trio

Purple Lavender Quartz Crystal

This is just a very small selection. They have over a thousand totes you can choose from, many of them unique art uploaded by the artists themselves. You can search by colour if you know what colour you would like, or you can type in a word and see what pops up – perhaps peacocks?

Perhaps dogs?

I’ve got 3 in my cart right now which are going to be gifts for family the next time they do 30% off with free shipping. ;)

shopping